What an Octopus Can Teach Moms About Thriving in the Deep End
Snuggling to watch the octopus show
The other day, my daughter wanted to sit and watch a show with me… about an octopus. At first, I was a bit hesitant because I thought they were strange creatures, but her excitement radiated, so I figured why not give it a try. After watching, I retract my thought - they are fascinating creatures!
As we were watching this nature show, we learned that this squiggly genius navigates the world with eight arms and zero instruction manual (no parent is around at the time of hatching). It wasn’t just drifting around aimlessly; it was observing, thinking, and even using tools to survive. Did you know scientists have discovered only 0.1% of animals use tools? That little octopus? It’s in the same club as chimpanzees, crows… and, apparently, moms.
It hit me: the octopus isn’t just smart—it’s adaptable. It gets tossed into unfamiliar situations all the time (kinda like being in the abyss) and doesn’t freeze or give up. It adjusts. It grabs what’s nearby, figures out what works, and keeps going. Sound familiar?
Mindset Shift: Moms, You’re Already Doing This
If you’re a mom—especially in a neurodivergent household—you are basically the human equivalent of a tool-using octopus.
You walk into uncharted territory daily. Your kid suddenly refuses the food they loved yesterday? You adapt. The routine that finally worked deteriorates overnight? You pivot. You cut the tags or adjust the seams to create a sensory-friendly outfit, find something to use as a fidget-toy distraction, or write out a last-minute visual schedule. That’s not failure or chaos—that’s brilliance.
Just like the octopus doesn’t panic when it can’t find a rock to hide under—it grabs a coconut or a shell instead—you’re using what’s around you to keep your family afloat. It’s not always pretty, but it’s creative, and more importantly, it works.
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Coaching Angle: You’re Already Using Tools—Now Let’s Use Them Intentionally
Tool use in the animal world is a sign of next-level intelligence. In the human world? It’s called survival—but it can also be a strategy.
What if you took a moment to actually see the tools you’re already using?
That 10-minute morning reset? Tool. And let’s be honest, a necessity.
Your mental checklist of “foods they’ll actually eat”? Tool.
The boundary you set around your phone after 9 PM? Tool.
Helping kids see when a challenge arises that it can be turned into an opportunity? Tool.
When you recognize what’s working, you can refine it. Build on it. Use it intentionally instead of reactively. Like the octopus, you already have what you need—you just might not realize how clever you're being. Give yourself credit!
Rainy days aren’t that bad if we can play games - challenges → opportunities
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Thriving in the Deep End
We all end up in the deep end sometimes—stretched thin, unsure, maybe even flailing a little. But like our eight-armed role model, that’s where we get creative. That’s where we grow. Not because we had the perfect plan, but because we had the ability to figure it out as we go.
You may not have suction cups or the ability to camouflage (though camouflage would be a great way to hide and get a break every now and again), but you do have resilience. You do have creativity. And you definitely have tools—whether it’s a notebook/planner, a friend, a deep breath, or the hidden snack stash you don’t tell the kids about.
So the next time you're in a situation where you're not sure what to do, channel your inner octopus. Get curious. Get flexible. Use what’s around you.
You’ve got this.
Mindful Moment:
What’s one unexpected “tool” you’ve used this week to make life smoother? How can you build on it or use it even more intentionally?
Until next time, enjoy the journey!
Copyright Me Time 4 Mom, LLC
