“Yes, And”: The Parenting and Coaching Technique Every Mom Needs to Know
Cap City Comedy Club sign advertising for the Tim Meadows show
A recent trip to the Cap City Comedy Club to see Tim Meadows reminded me about what improv comedians and coaches have in common.
Besides running on caffeine and curiosity…they both love the phrase: “Yes, and.”
In comedy, “Yes, and” keeps the scene alive. One actor says, “We’re surrounded by squirrels!” and the other doesn’t shut it down with, “No we’re not.” Instead, they add to it “Yes, and they’ve formed a tiny squirrel mountain!”
In coaching, it’s the same idea. “Yes, and” keeps the conversation alive.
When a mom says, “I never get anything done,” a good coach doesn’t respond with, “Well, you just need better time management.”
Instead, they say:
“Yes, that feeling is so real—and it makes sense with everything you’re juggling. What is one way you could make it better?”
It’s not just affirmation. It’s expansion.
“Yes” = I hear you.
“And” = Let’s build from here.
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This tiny shift in language takes the pressure off and invites self-compassion in. It keeps the door open for change without closing down the emotion.
Want to try it on yourself?
Instead of: “I’m tired, but I need to push through,”
Say: “I’m tired, and what is one small step that I can take that feels doable?”
Now try it out on your kid:
Kid: “I don’t want to clean my room!”
You: “Yes, and what’s one way we can make it stink a little less?”
It’s about connection, compassion and validating feelings (for us as moms too).
“Yes, and” doesn’t change the facts—it changes the energy.
And sometimes, that’s all we need.
Until next time, enjoy the journey!
Copyright Me Time 4 Mom, LLC
